The past, the future, Sarah Chalke and Obi-Wan Kenobi

So, I had a bit of a strange dream last Sunday night...

I was say with my younger (18 year old) self in a comedy club whilst he was on a date with Scrubs actress, Sarah Chalke.

It gets weirder...

Sarah Chalke - the one who got away?

Ewan Macgregor was hosting the night and in homage younger Chris had dressed up as Obi-wan Kenobi in true Star Wars nerd fashion.

The date was not going well and soon Sarah left and I pursued her, eventually telling her that she was one of the two women in my life that I wished things had been different with and that she'd not gotten away.

I spent the following morning dissecting this and came up with a couple of thoughts.

One was that I need more sleep, maybe cut out watching Scrubs or finally accept that Stella left Ted at the altar in How I met your mother.

The other was something a little more introspective than that.

Although I'm happy with family life part of me has been seriously hankering for my student days when life was so much easier. If I had no lectures or work I could pretty much do nothing where as now I'm pretty much busy all of the time and time is the most valuable commodities I have.

Why wouldn't I feel fond of that time?

I think my subconscious mind decided to remind current me of one unfortunate truth... Student Chris was a dork.

Social skills were somewhat limited when dealing with members of the fairer gender. I couldn't read a signal if it was a 90 foot neon sign.

For me, there had been but one faithful love in my life - Star Wars. I'd immersed myself into the Galaxy far far away, probably to escape the problems in the real world. All the time I had the Empire, I had no need of anything else. Unfortunately it over spilt into day to day life and it took living with Caz to break free and become more normal. I was taken out more and socialised with people and although my geekiness continued it really did begin to tapper off.

Now, I struggle to remember half of what I kinew - and I knew a hell of a lot of pointless information like Stormtrooper service numbers, the names of starships, the life cycles of Sarlacs...

I suppose my brain was trying to tell me that, although we all look through rose tinted glasses at our past, there are shocking realities that we, understandably ignore and that the past should remain the past. There is no reason to spend your future trying to maintain the past or indeed an idealised version of the past that was not attainable in the first place.

Then this afternoon whilst cruising the Internet I hit upon something else:

 

 

The final line from JD says it all for me...